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Luggable Time Machine

Time Machines

“—All You Zombies—”

by Robert A. Heinlein

A 25-year-old man, originally born as an orphan girl named Jane, tells his story to a 55-year-old bartender who then recruits him for a time-travel adventure.
— Michael Main
When I opened you, I found a mess. I sent for the Chief of Surgery while I got the baby out, then we held a consultation with you on the table—and worked for hours to salvage what we could. You had two full sets of organs, both immature, but with the female set well enough developed for you to have a baby. They could never be any use to you again, so we took them out and rearranged things so that you can develop properly as a man.

“‘—All You Zombies—’” by Robert A. Heinlein, Magazine of Fantasy and Science Fiction, March 1959.

Ijon Tichy

Ze wspomnień Ijona Tichego, pt. 4

Literal: From remembrances of Ijon Tichy, pt. 4

by Stanisław Lem

Ijon is unphased when Physicist Molteris lugs his time machine into Ijon’s sitting room, promising Ijon will be repaid for the colossal amount of electricity that will be consumed by the first trip.
— Michael Main
Zamierzałem, ale . . . widzi pan . . . ja . . . mój gospodarz wyłączył mi elektrycznoćś . . . w niedzielę.
I planned to, but, you see, I—my landlord turned off the electricity on Sunday.
English

[ex=bare]Ze wspomnień Ijona Tichego, pt. 4 | From remembrances of Ijon Tichy, pt. 4[/ex] by Stanisław Lem, in Księga robotów (Iskry, 1961).

from The Teacher of Symmetry Cycle

Фотография Пушкин (1799–2099)

Fotografiya Pushkin (1799–2099) English release: Pushkin’s Photograph (1799–2099) Literal: Pushkin’s photograph (1799–2099)

by Андре́й Би́тов

In 1985, an author has visions of a time traveler named Igor from 2099. The traveler is being sent by his comrades in the domed city of St. Petersburg back to the 19th century, where he is tasked with capturing images and audio of motherland’s supreme father of poetry, Alexander Sergeyevich Pushkin.

Note: A dissertation by [ex=bare]Гулиус Наталья Сергеевна | Gulius Natalya Sergeevna[/ex] notes that this story is part of Bitov’s Teacher of Symmetry Cycle, which consisted of a series of avant-garde stories purportedly written by an obscure Englishman named [ex=bare]Э. Тайрд-Боффин | A. Tired-Boffin[/ex] and loosely translated to Russian by Bitov. The English version of “Fotografiya Pushkin (1799–2099)” was said to have been called “Shakespeare’s Photograph” (or possibly “Stern’s Laughter” or “Swift’s Pill”), and presumably it was about Shakespeare rather than Pushkin.

Sergeevna explains that all this artistic mystification was part of an extensive footnote to “Fotografiya Pushkin (1799–2099),” but up in the ITTDB Citadel, we’ve yet to track down the footnote. Perhaps it was part of the 1987 publication in [ex=bare]Знамя || Znamia[/ex], or maybe it did not appear until the story was published along with the rest of the cycle in Bitov’s 1988 collection, [ex=bare]Человек в пейзаже | Man in the landscape | Chelovek v peyzazhe[/ex]. It is not listed in the table of contents of [ex=bare]Преподаватель симметрии ] | | Prepodavatelʹ simmetrii[/ex](2008), which was translated to English as Symmetry Teacher (2014).

— Michael Main
. . . мы сможем в будущем, и не таком, господа-товарищи, далеком, заснять всю жизнь Пушкина скрытой камерой, записать его гол . . . представляете, какое это будет счастье, когда каждый школьник сможет услышать, как Пушкин читает собственные стихи!
. . . we will be able in the future, and, gentlemen-comrades, not such a distant one, to photograph Pushkin’s entire life with a hidden camera, record his voice . . . imagine how wonderful it will be when every schoolboy will be able to hear Pushkin read his own poetry!
English

[ex=bare]Фотография Пушкин (1799–2099) | Pushkin’s Photograph (1799–2099) | “Fotografiya Pushkin (1799–2099)”[/ex] by Андре́й Би́тов, [ex=bare]Знамя || Znamia[/ex], January 1987.

The Moment Universe Stories 1

Some Like It Cold

by John Kessel

Sure, others have pulled that 20th century actress forward to make modern films with spectacular failure, each attempt spawning a branch universe unconnected to the 21st century of time traveler Det Gruber, but none of the others took into account the psychological factors in the way that Det’s employers have done.
— Michael Main
She may be a wreck, but she wants to be here. Not like Paramount’s version.

“Some Like It Cold” by John Kessel, Omni, Fall 1995.

The Moment Universe Stories 2

The Miracle of Ivar Avenue

by John Kessel

In 1949 Los Angeles, Detective Lee Kinlaw has writer/director Preston Sturges down in the morgue. The only problem is that Sturges is still alive and well in Hollywood.
— Michael Main
It’s a transmogrifier. A device that can change anyone into anyone else. I can change General MacArthur into President Truman, Shirley Temple into Marilyn Monroe.

“The Miracle of Ivar Avenue” by John Kessel, in Intersections: The Sycamore Hill Antholgy , edited by John Kessel et al., January 1996.

Sabrina, the Teenage Witch (s07e08)

Bada Ping!

by Nancy Cohen, directed by Anson Williams

Sabrina takes Salem into the future to find out her fate after gangster Mickey Brentwood finds out that she’s writing an exposé on his shady practices.
— Inmate Jan
You see, this thug nightclub owner threatened our little Lois Lame over there—

Sabrina, the Teenage Witch (s07e08), “Bada Ping!” by Nancy Cohen, directed by Anson Williams (The WB-TV, USA, 22 November 2002).

Moment Universe Stories 4

It’s All True

by John Kessel

About five years after the first two Moment Universe stories, time traveling talent scount Det Gruber heads to 1942 in hopes of recruiting young, bitter Orson Welles to accompany him back to the future.
— Michael Main
Welles clenched his fists. When he spoke it was in a lower tone. “Life is dark.”

“It’s All True” by John Kessel, in Sci Fiction, 5 November 2003.

Dimensions

by Antony Neely, directed by Sloan U’Ren

Imagine you’re a young boy in 1921 Cambridge when your equally young first love dies in a deep well. What would you do? Naturally, you’d vow to become a great scientist in an artsy movie so you could go back in time to alter the tragic event.

Apparently, people in early 20th-century Cambridge espouse many wise thoughts about time, parallel universes that encompass every possible combination of events again and again, and something about every decision every made creating a branch point. In the end, it's difficult to make a cohesive model of time from the plotline of Dimensions, but we tried our best to do so in our plot notes.

— Michael Main
Annie: Are you ready to leave?
Stephen: Yes.
Annie: How long will it take?
Stephen: I don’t know: seconds, decades, an eternity.
Annie: An eternity? For a few moments together?
Stephen: Yes.

Dimensions by Antony Neely, directed by Sloan U’Ren (Cambridge Film Festival, 21 September 2011).

A Time Travel Short

written and directed by Antonette Ho

A mysterious box allows Linda to travel back in time for five minutes at each go, so she starts out by taking five minutes at age 14 to stand up to a bully who’s harrassing a friend.
— Michael Main
Rule 3: Owner will be sent back to the present after 5 minutes are up.

A Time Travel Short written and directed by Antonette Ho, 3-part serial (Youtube: Antonette H Channel, 4 November 2015) to 17 January 2016).

Here and Now and Then

by Mike Chen

When time travel agent Kin Stewart finds himself rapidly losing his memory and stranded in 1996, he writes a journal of his life in the future and proceeds to break every rule in the book by creating a new life and family in his new present . . . until a retriever shows up in 2014.
— Michael Main
Science fiction. She thought the journal was filled with tales, like her Doctor Who or Heather’s Star Trek shows.

Here and Now and Then by Mike Chen (Mira, January 2019).

Il était une seconde fois

English release: Twice Upon a Time Literal: It was a second time

by Nathalie Leuthreau and Guillaume Nicloux, directed by Giillaume Nicloux

At first, Vincent’s only plan for the mysterious 600mm wooden cube that provides a tunnel to the past is to make sure that Louise doesn’t break up with him four months in the past, but new circumstances soon raise the stakes. Then it gets weird in this four-part miniseries.
— Michael Main
En fait, je suis passé dans un cube, et ça . . .
I actually went through this cube, and it . . .
English

[ex=bare]Il était une seconde fois | It was a second time[/ex] by Nathalie Leuthreau and Guillaume Nicloux, directed by Giillaume Nicloux, at the Berlin International Film Festival, 12 February 2019.

The Umbrella Academy, Season 1

by multiple writers and directors

Of the 43 children born 1 October 1989 with no gestation period, the eccentric and sometimes cruel billionaire Reginald Hargreeves brought up seven of them and turned them into the super-powered group called the Umbrella Academy when they developed powers. Nearly thirty years later, after Hargreeves dies, the five surviving members of the group gather at their family home. Oh, and: Number Six died some time ago and only Number Four can see him; Number Five disappeared about seventeen years ago, but he’s back (and in his 13-year-old body) after living 45 years in a post-apocalyptic future that’s scheduled to start in eight days.
— Michael Main
As far as I could tell, I was the last person left alive. I never figured out what killed the human race. I did find something else: the date it happens. . . . The world ends in eight days, and I have no idea how to stop it.

The Umbrella Academy, Season 1 by multiple writers and directors, 10 episodes (Netflix, USA, 15 February 2019).

The Umbrella Academy, Season 2

by multiple writers and directors

Five’s plan for the Umbrella siblings to escape the apocalypse by going into the past ends up scattering them throughout different years of Dallas in the 1960s. They manage okay on their own until shortly after 11/22/63, when secondary effects from changes to the timeline cause a nuclear holocaust that can be averted only by recently arrived Five jumping back to 11/15/63 to exert his unique charm into getting the gang to work together.
— Michael Main
Hazel to Five: If you want to live, come with me.”

The Umbrella Academy, Season 2 by multiple writers and directors, ten episodes (Netflix, USA, 31 July 2020).

The Umbrella Academy, Season 3


After stopping the JFK-induced apocalypse in Season 2, the six Umbrella siblings return to 2019 where they no longer exist and their still-living father has founded The Sparrow Academy in their stead.
— Michael Main
Well, someone killed our mothers, so we shouldn’t exist, but clearly we do exist, and the universe can’t handle it, which is a problem.

The Umbrella Academy, Season 3 (Netflix, 22 June 2022).

Frank & Ernest

Microwaves

by Tom Thaves

. . . and this one is our top of the line

“Microwaves” by Tom Thaves, from Frank & Ernest (syndicated by Newspaper Enterprise Association, 3 October 2023).

as of 12:49 p.m. MDT, 18 May 2024
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