The Internet Time Travel Database
Amy plus Six: Amy, it’s me . .
. you, I time traveled from six years in the future.
Amy: How does that work?
Amy plus Six: I don’t know! How does electricity work? You just pay for it. Now listen, five-years-in-the-future-you is gonna come back and talk to you.
Amy: Wait, I thought you were from the future.
Amy plus Six: I’m six-years-in-the-future-you. Five-years-in-the-future-you has bangs. Now, she’s gonna come and she’s gonna tell you—
Amy: If I should get bangs or not?
Amy plus Six: No! Shut the fuck up! She’s gonna tell you not to move in with Travis.
Amy: (devastated) Why not?
Amy plus Six: Because he cheats on you; he gives you gonorrhea and bed bugs. It’s a nightmare.
Amy: Oh, God, I’ve never had bed bugs before. I won’t move in with him.
Amy
plus Six: Oh, no no no. You have to move in with him, okay? It turns out that by
being warned to break up with Travis that things in the future get really screwed up, and
California is now in the ocean.
1 English variant